We are starting to get involved here. I am digging in my heels. A lot. I don't really want to get involved. In anything.
I've been put on the schedule to help out with Sunday School at church. Not often. Just once in a while. Do I have to? Apparently.
We had another family over for dinner for the first time since moving here (with the exception of out of town company that we already know). It was fine. My heart wasn't really there. I grumbled inside the whole time I was cleaning the house in preparation for the "big night". I just didn't want to do it.
We've joined a "Connect Group". This is a new name for Bible Study, I think. We do follow a study that is based on God's Word, but there is much more emphasis on connecting with other people and building relationships. I'd rather not connect or build.
I think I just want to kind of hang out with only my family for however long we live here - even though we're planning to be here for the next 25-30. Pretty much a life sentence, if ya look at it that way.
I'll let you in on why. Don't tell Barry. He just won't get it.
I'm tired.
I've moved over and over and over. Every time it's hard. Every time I eventually make some wonderful "I don't know how I ever lived without this person" friends.
Then we move.
Again.
The friends that are truly "keep forever" friends, I do keep forever. But now it's bittersweet.
These kinds of friends are few and far between. It takes years to find them, and now they don't come for coffee on a Wednesday afternoon. Now my heart lights up when I see their number on the call display. I pour one cup of coffee, I drink my coffee and dust my house while we chat.
Then I cry after we hang up.
My heart is tired.
I don't want to put out the effort to get to know all these new people. I already have friends that I love. The problem is that they don't live in Didsbury.
I know that it would be good for me to make friends here. I know that I can still keep all my wonderful friends even if I make new ones. I just don't want to. Because.
So, when are you moving to Didsbury?
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4 comments:
Ahhhhhh......sweets!!
Char and I talk about you guys all the time!!! We miss you sooooooo much and we can't wait to come see you in November!!
I hear ya! I moved ALL THE TIME growing up and just great "tired" of making new friends that I'd eventually leave as well. We can't give up though!! Keep praying and draw on HIM to be your best friend......who...thank goodness....travels WITH us where ever we go!!!! :)
Love you!!!!!!
Ok...that was suppposed to read...."got tired" not great tired! lol
(Still working on my morning coffee here!! lol ) ;)
I hear ya.
Hear ya.
IT is exhausting.
Well girl, you just need to make new friends anyway. Whether or not they are 'forever friends' really doesn't matter.
What matters is that if you hold back, they will be missing out on someone who can make a difference in their lives. Regardless of what you may get from those relationships, you are a woman of wisdom, love, laughter and common sense that I believe can influence many.
It would be such a waste to sit in 'the hole' for that life sentence.
That said, I wish you were here too. But how 'bout I come for coffee next week? REALLY.
Love you, Char
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